A chill in the air yet, but the sounds and smells of spring arise as well, this first morning of daylight savings time ( yay! ). The grass needs mowed, everything feels like it needs to be cleaned, new birth is in the air. Spring has its sorrows for me, yet still reminds me that life goes on and forward. Personally, I am but a tulip bud, blossoming for a mere season and I too, shall demise. Enough doom, winter is on its way out. I am in need of the sunshine and green grass under my bare feet.
A new baby by this time next year. I think I am ready. I hope we all are. A new daughter in law soon, a new 6 year old grand son, my son, marrying his Mother. Prayers for lives full of Spring for all of them.
Working on becoming more simplistic, this lifestyle I try to maintain has become a burden. Time soon to work on my tiny mobile house and begin to do some traveling and camping. More to come...
Sunday, March 13, 2016
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
St. Valentine, save me! (or someone - idk)
I should be ashamed of myself.
But, I'm a little tired of shaming myself.
One of these days, I might actually be good enough for even myself! <>.
It's been 9 months since my last post, and I promised myself then I would be better about it. Back to the shaming part.
So, here's the topic. It's February 2nd. Well, that's the start of the topic anyway. The main topic right now is how much I've finally figured out that
I MISS having LOVE in my life. I have been doing a little research into different meeting spots lately - and, having drawn the attention of one specific gentleman (until the pictures were exchanged and I played back the underlying suggestions in my own mind, outside of everything else), I just want what alot of single women want. I just want a good guy. I don't even care what he looks like anymore (save that). As for February, well - I did get married on the 14th once, and that was a mistake - absolutely RUINED the holiday for me - I guess deep down inside I am still a romantic at heart...
Now, here's my issues - I'm 50. I've been married twice, and other than my beautiful children who have their own lives (how fortunate they are!) - neither marriage was a good one and neither marriage stuck. But it really isn't all about marriage! It's just about finding love. Feeling that emotion for someone. Caring for and about someone - and being cared about. It doesn't seem that difficult. Almost all of my friends found their love early in life and are still married. I won't ever have that (and I won't cry at work). Oh boy, now I've gone and gotten myself depressed.
Alright, see sometimes I just need to talk things out in my own head. I'm already better for just saying it. Tori is almost grown (end of her Junior year and yes, we are both still alive!) and I want school (college) for her so badly...praying that works out. It probably wouldnt hurt to put a little prayer back in my life - as it is in His hands anyway, and only the Lord knows which guy would be a good match for me...
Happy Valentines Day (soon). Bah-humbug. :)
Friday, June 25, 2010
Michael
Having a little difficulty concentrating on what I need to be concentrating on today. Perhaps I should also be taking ADD medicine! Today is the one year anniversary of the loss of Michael Jackson. All of the feelings that I personally had about this loss have come flooding back and I just can't think about anything else so far this morning! Between this - and my concern over the Gulf Coast and the oil spill, I'm just like 'BLAH!!'...We are three weeks into summer and I am all ready for school to start so that my concern for what Tori is doing can be minmized as well. Gotta love a jobless teenage girl in the summertime....
Back to my attempt at concentrating; I'll put my thoughts of Michael away for the time being. Miss the man and the music he made - and was ready for more....His song, You are not alone, reminds me of him. Silly post...but it's where my head is today.
Tuesday, December 1, 2009
Saturday, November 28, 2009
Too few and far between....
GOD I am bored.
Now, someone tell me what's up with that? It's not like I don't have a million things I could be doing. But instead of doing them - I'll just complain about being bored.
We've moved again. We're transients. I'm a freak. I don't know what I want. It's possible that I am all of those things. I'm constantly on the prowl for something better - and then I miss what I had. I'm SCREWED UP. You know, I never thought I was really...I thought I was normal and everyone else was insane. Well, I'm waking up from that dream quicky! But, back to bored. It's the weekend after Thanksgiving. I have SO MUCH to be thankful for - mainly my family. My mother is still with me and I am most grateful for that. At my age - and hers - she is truly my very best friend. I'm praying my daughter feels the same way about me when she is my age. But, I also hope I'm not around at my Mom's age (I know, be careful what you ask for). We won't touch anymore on that topic because you probably won't like my personal philosophy on that. SEE HOW BORED I AM?
Dinner tonight for my sons, their girlfriends, Tori and her friend. Chicken and Dumplins for all. It was good stuff! Desserts too - and they were good as well. I think I spent all day on this - but considering to get both of my boys under my roof at the same time is like pulling teeth, to spend all day on their arrival and dinner was so worth it!
And now - I've managed to bore myself and talk myself into sleepy. I was up early and didn't sleep well so I'll try and make up for that tonight.
Sleep well, world.
Now, someone tell me what's up with that? It's not like I don't have a million things I could be doing. But instead of doing them - I'll just complain about being bored.
We've moved again. We're transients. I'm a freak. I don't know what I want. It's possible that I am all of those things. I'm constantly on the prowl for something better - and then I miss what I had. I'm SCREWED UP. You know, I never thought I was really...I thought I was normal and everyone else was insane. Well, I'm waking up from that dream quicky! But, back to bored. It's the weekend after Thanksgiving. I have SO MUCH to be thankful for - mainly my family. My mother is still with me and I am most grateful for that. At my age - and hers - she is truly my very best friend. I'm praying my daughter feels the same way about me when she is my age. But, I also hope I'm not around at my Mom's age (I know, be careful what you ask for). We won't touch anymore on that topic because you probably won't like my personal philosophy on that. SEE HOW BORED I AM?
Dinner tonight for my sons, their girlfriends, Tori and her friend. Chicken and Dumplins for all. It was good stuff! Desserts too - and they were good as well. I think I spent all day on this - but considering to get both of my boys under my roof at the same time is like pulling teeth, to spend all day on their arrival and dinner was so worth it!
And now - I've managed to bore myself and talk myself into sleepy. I was up early and didn't sleep well so I'll try and make up for that tonight.
Sleep well, world.
Thursday, June 25, 2009
One Tribute of Millions to the King of Pop
Mr. Michael Jackson died today.
Michael was born in 1958, two years prior to my birth. He and I cut our teeth on our older sisters & brother's rock -n- roll music that was labeled 'wild' and the teenagers 'were out of control' in the early sixties and seventies.
Michael Jackson - and his brothers - forming the Jackson Five in total, were part of 'my crowd' - their music was what we sang - their voices what my friends cried over. The Osmond Family, the Jackson Five and The Monkees; a little bit of the Beatles and drips of Elvis - what a great young life and early teenage life of music I got to experience.
I prided myself - and my voice - on being able to copy some of Michael's high notes in the song "Ben". I always seemed to want to croon this song along with Michael everytime it came on the radio - wait, I think I have the 45 Record!!! I tried singing along with it this afternoon in a small radio tribute to Michael - and I must say, even after several decades of abusing my voice with smoking, I can still hit some of the notes - and I still love to sing the song.
On my 30th Birthday, my ex husband took me to see Michael in Dallas at Reunion for his "BAD" tour. We had great floor seats - but as usual, with it sucking royally to be short, I saw most of his concert on the two big screens on either side of the stage - because I couldn't see the stage over the people. Still - great. Absolutely great. I'm Bad, I'm Bad - you know it!!
We hadn't heard alot about Michael lately; God love the man - he lived quite a tortured life. Personally, I don't believe in pronouncing guilt on someone I don't know - and, I personally have no right to judge his actions or lack thereof. Michael was ONE OF A KIND. No, he wasn't Elvis. He was Michael Jackson. Like Elvis, he left his own brand on this world - this lifetime - and my life. Can you say that about your own life? I know I can't.
Thank you, Michael - for all you brought into this world, for all you gave to us - your music - and your life. You will be missed.
Michael was born in 1958, two years prior to my birth. He and I cut our teeth on our older sisters & brother's rock -n- roll music that was labeled 'wild' and the teenagers 'were out of control' in the early sixties and seventies.
Michael Jackson - and his brothers - forming the Jackson Five in total, were part of 'my crowd' - their music was what we sang - their voices what my friends cried over. The Osmond Family, the Jackson Five and The Monkees; a little bit of the Beatles and drips of Elvis - what a great young life and early teenage life of music I got to experience.
I prided myself - and my voice - on being able to copy some of Michael's high notes in the song "Ben". I always seemed to want to croon this song along with Michael everytime it came on the radio - wait, I think I have the 45 Record!!! I tried singing along with it this afternoon in a small radio tribute to Michael - and I must say, even after several decades of abusing my voice with smoking, I can still hit some of the notes - and I still love to sing the song.
On my 30th Birthday, my ex husband took me to see Michael in Dallas at Reunion for his "BAD" tour. We had great floor seats - but as usual, with it sucking royally to be short, I saw most of his concert on the two big screens on either side of the stage - because I couldn't see the stage over the people. Still - great. Absolutely great. I'm Bad, I'm Bad - you know it!!
We hadn't heard alot about Michael lately; God love the man - he lived quite a tortured life. Personally, I don't believe in pronouncing guilt on someone I don't know - and, I personally have no right to judge his actions or lack thereof. Michael was ONE OF A KIND. No, he wasn't Elvis. He was Michael Jackson. Like Elvis, he left his own brand on this world - this lifetime - and my life. Can you say that about your own life? I know I can't.
Thank you, Michael - for all you brought into this world, for all you gave to us - your music - and your life. You will be missed.
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Another weekend morning - thoughts and ramblings
Bright blue today. The color of the sky when the weather is going to be beautiful. Wishful thinking today? Probably. I always said that Summertime was my FAVORITE time of the year; I still basically believe that's true. However---it's already friggin' HOT here during the day, and I still don't have a swimming pool in my backyard. Let's not get me started on that topic, shall we?
Neighbors across the street are having a garage - well, yard - sale. Good for them this morning, bad for them this afternoon. I may be having a garage sale with the stuff I have to pull out of my garage just to get my car back out! The threat of severe weather sent me scrambling last night to clear out my one-car garage just enough to get the SUV inside and out of what was deemed in Weatherford as 'softball sized' hail....well, that didn't make it to Garland (thank Goodness) but - hey, you never know! Anyway, yay for my industrious neighbors and their sale. Not only am I not going to join them and have one - but I'm not going over there to have a look-see either. They have a dog and two children...can't think of a thing I'd want.
Not much on the plans for the weekend; I do believe we will make a trip to Arlington tomorrow to visit with my Mom. Tori won't be too happy that Ireland isn't there. C'est la vie, my darling daughter.
Well, I'm off in search of the ever elusive 'good deal' vacation spot. The road trip I talked about previously is in question - I really want to go to the beach. Really. Want. To. Go. So, I'm all about the information superhighway to locate the cottage by the sea of my dreams - just one that won't cost $1500 a week.
Ya'll enjoy your weekend!
Neighbors across the street are having a garage - well, yard - sale. Good for them this morning, bad for them this afternoon. I may be having a garage sale with the stuff I have to pull out of my garage just to get my car back out! The threat of severe weather sent me scrambling last night to clear out my one-car garage just enough to get the SUV inside and out of what was deemed in Weatherford as 'softball sized' hail....well, that didn't make it to Garland (thank Goodness) but - hey, you never know! Anyway, yay for my industrious neighbors and their sale. Not only am I not going to join them and have one - but I'm not going over there to have a look-see either. They have a dog and two children...can't think of a thing I'd want.
Not much on the plans for the weekend; I do believe we will make a trip to Arlington tomorrow to visit with my Mom. Tori won't be too happy that Ireland isn't there. C'est la vie, my darling daughter.
Well, I'm off in search of the ever elusive 'good deal' vacation spot. The road trip I talked about previously is in question - I really want to go to the beach. Really. Want. To. Go. So, I'm all about the information superhighway to locate the cottage by the sea of my dreams - just one that won't cost $1500 a week.
Ya'll enjoy your weekend!
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